By chance, I open the door just as the dogs are running toward it The one keeps running to me and is happy to come in. The other, seeing me, stops dead in her tracks.
"Do you want to come in?" I ask. She pretends she didn't hear.
"Okay," I say, and close the door. She can't speak the words "No thanks, Dad." I know that. And she's not allowed to growl at me, any more than I'm allowed to growl at the wife. So if I ask the dog a question and her answer is "no", she just ignores me. We both know how it works.
Then I look, and she's still there. So I open the door and ask again.
She ignores me again. I get the message. She'll let me know when she wants in.
//
It doesn't work like that with people. If somebody asks if I want something I didn't ask for, or if they ask if I'd mind that they do something (which obviously they think I would mind or they wouldn't have asked) my typical response is the cold, blank stare. Something like what I got from the dog this morning, but more obvious what I'm thinking.
But people don't take the cold stare from me the way I take it from the dog. If I don't object in words, they pretend to think I don't object. They go ahead and do.
I wonder if they treat their dogs the same way. Probably.
Oh! She just barked to come in. Gotta run.
